hi to all those who visit my blog. hahax. im back to blogging again. lolz. came back from chalet. exhausted, deprived from sleep.. but ITS FUN okiez?! hahax.

this is e chalet ive enjoyed most n love most.
thanks to all who make this possible. =]

CHALET



first day: 27.08.2008 wed


vonnyl dear is late. i met up wif her before going to chalet. coz we r going tog. =] so when we reach there. we r shock. coz only wy, stella, farzana, ameerah, juliana, germaine n shimei there. is like. no guys. hahax. but is like expected lah. nvm. then me n vonnyl went to buy curry chix noodles. eating it while dy came. n dy, u r e first guy. erm. shld be gay. oops. no offend. =D


random. dy likes scott. lolz.





so i shall cont. then went to fair price to buy lots of bbq stuffs. n seriously, we bought a lot. hahax. =] i shall summarise bahx. if not it will be damn long. hahax. so we checked in. its damn small. hahax. then after settling down we decided to go cycle. me n deyu skate. lolz. to dy: u good lah. noe how to skate still say dunno. hahax. then fall also have style de. push ups position. i shall learn. lolz.





erm. so after we went cycling. vonnyl n stella learning how to cycle. jia you. n specially to mention, vonnyl is free rider. lolz. deyu reminded me to blog de. hahax. n vonnyl current craze is "very big cock". thanks to dy for teaching her. hahax. think she'll get high wif tat phrase in class. =] but tats gonna be 6 weeks later. gonna miss all of u. sobz.





now i understood wat is free rider: yvonne n deyu ride on e two seater bike. yvonne at e back, dy at e front. dy use more input. so yvonne is free rider. understand ma? heex.





okiez. then dy went to his fren de chalet n e rest of us went back chalet to watch movie/ chit chatting. before tat. stupid ms kept scaring me wif his talks on those spirituals. scared me okiez?! i damn timid de. then noe wat. ms is missing. then is like scary. but in e end. is he lost his way lah. stupid. =D



dy is drunk on e 1st night. funny. he was talking craps. lolz. n is like he's high. he even scare tat he'll sleep on e road halfway coming back to our chalet. lolz.

erm. i didnt get to sleep on e first night. lolz. insomnia.like always. ='(
thanks stella for accompanying me not sleeping (unlike vonnyl dear who dozes off) =D


second day: 28.08.2008 thu

i ate chix rice early in e morning. nice nice nice. =] erm. went bowling. n i must say YEAH!!! i break my prv record. lolz. i finally break zero!!! i mean e total. i get 21 marks leh. not bad for me le.=D used to get zero for e total score. [emo=(]

second day is mostly preparing for bbq. lolz. i was having fun siting on top of tolilet bowl to watch dy n juliana murdering stingray, prawns n squids. lolz. tats stinks e toilet.

ameerah's mum is damn COOL. her culinary skills are superb. lolz. i like e durian puffs. this resulted in a few ulcers on my tongue. *pain* so we went to buy alcoholic drinks. lolz. n we played games n loser need to drink. as expected. im lousy at games. so ya. =( hahax. i hate e left right game okiez?! can someone pls teach me how to diff left n right w/o time to think?..

n im not drunk ok. lolz. only tat my face turns red easily. coz im shy bahx.wahahax. =x its fun seeing almost everyone is like turning red. n seriously gettin a little bit drunk will make u forget all e worries n u will feel happy. lolz.

NOTE: dy is weak in drinking. bleex. =D

so i only managed to sleep a bit tat night. coz my vonnyl dear is trying to push me out of e bed. lolz.hahax. n im damn cold, but she's snatching away my blanket. lolz.

last day: 29.08.2008 fri

sec night a no of ppl went home. so last day only left me, wy, dy, ms, vonnyl, stella, jamie, jackson, xw n kh. most of us going back to sec sch so we check out at 0645. lolz. damn early. on e way home, some of us stomach upset. hahax. i tink due to e belachan stingray n squids. lolz. n im like having skin allergy le. i tink squids caused it bahx. lolz.

concluding. this chalet i really love it very much. i really enjoyed it wif u guys.=]

signing off...

take care dudes. =D see ya guys soon. miss ya.

THIS POST IS GONNA BE EMO.



THIS SHALL BE THE LAST POST ABOUT SOMEONE WHO HURTS ME MOST.

im so tired. only being able to sleep at 5am. then guess wat, woke up at 9am. i hate it man. insomnia, i hate u. just get out of my life can u? i hate swollen eyes n shredding tears. i wont do it anymore.

after one night of thinking. i shall vent out my angers n this shall be e last time i talking abt it here.

e someone wont be here anymore to read my blog, so i just say out wat i feel bahx.

and this will be e last time im so sad over this thing, after today, i will lead a happy life de. n as wat ive promised, i will still be friend with e someone. this is wat ive promised. I HATE PEOPLE BREAKING PROMISES.

i seriously have a lot of things to regret. but i noe its too late for anything. but as least i say everything out, maybe i can forget everything faster bahx.

so due to myself being so free, i shall list them all out.

i regretted knowing u, regretted giving things up because of u, i regretted being close to u in camp, regretted being in e same grp as u in camp, regretted sharing with u all my problems, regretted thinking ur shoulders are nice to lean on, regretted being so weak for u, regretted being together with u, n most importantly, i regretted LOVING YOU!!!

am i so not worth to be loved. i have given in to u a lot, giving u wat u want, n giving u all e freedom u want, but wat happens in e end? u reciprocate me with this kind of rubbish?

and i seriously believe in retribution, coz ive gotten mine. n u have tasted e feeling of being hurt by ur love one, so why will u do it to someone who loved u? why must u be so cruel? n seriously, if u are not able to let go of ur past relationship, why get into another to hurt someone else? dun always say tat u have let go, NO, u hasnt. n u will not.

n stop lying to me. watever u say is just lies. n to myself, can u stop being so dumb to believe everything he said?

this time u really hurt me too much. i assure u it will be a scar in my heart forever n ever.

i hate u walking into my life, making me fall in love wif u, n ending up leaving me just becoz u dun wan to get committed. wat do u treat me as? a thing tat u take for granted? n just like maybe a sport tat u take it up becoz u think its nice or watever sort, n just give it up coz u tink u r tired of it or u dun want to commit to it anymore? hey, im a human okiez? dun i look one? hahax.

how i wish u just stay as e one who admires me, n we are just acquaintance, or maybe just frens. if one day i were to become a les or watsoever, its ur fault. hahax. im not blaming u, i only seemed like blaming u.

n i promise, i will do all i can n all sort of rubbish or wat, just to forget u. hahax.

thanks for nothing.

now i can just hope tat my life will be better without u, or i shld say,wif u, just as a fren. coz as ive promised.

hahax. back to my real self, this post is so wat, hahax, it doesnt sound wat i will usually write. so this time im really hurt okiez?!

n for someone, this post is not for scolding u or wat, is just things i wrote to vent out my angers n emotions. after today, IF we were to meet in sch or wat, i will still be e one who will smile n talk to u, coz U ARE MY FREN. i love to be nice to my frens.

i shall not cry anymore for u le. to myself: its not worth crying over someone who hurts u. hahax.

and for e time being, i dunno whether to go skates or not. even if i dun go, it will be not becoz of u, is just becoz im not free or just i dun feel like going. hahax. after one night of thoughts, i wont change anything becoz of u, coz not worth it, n i will stop being so dumb. n skates is wat i enjoy, so ya. hahax.

n for u, i hope tat u will fulfil ur promises too. although u have broken a lot. hahax. we will still be frens. n ya, its better to talk to each other or wat than avoiding, coz i dun wan to end up in awkward situations. hahax. n just take it tat nth has happen before. we only stop at friendship. hahax. i know u can do it de unlike me. but i will try my best de. hahax.

now i seriously noe frens and family are the best people to have in life. n i will treasure them like how i treasure my eyelashes. lolz. weird comparison ritez? hahax.

okiez. i shall end my emo post le. lolz. so for those who are reading it. sorry for making u all so emo, if u all feel emo lah. hahax.

n today is e first day without u, i went out wif vonnyl, debbie, juliana, weiying n jamie. they are very nice n wonderful frens to have. i will cherish them de. hahax. first day without u, n i lived happily. lolz. i will cont to stay happy de. jia you to me. lolz.

n ps: please start learning to treasure ppl who love u.

n for all my frens out there. take care.

n most imptly, thanks shiya for being there for me when im down. shiya, i love u okiez?! hahax.


TO THE SOMEONE: lets be frens forever. hahax. n hope our frenship will last. =]

it have been a long time since i last blogged. ok lah,actually not very long. hahax. coz like wat vonnyl says, im a lag queen. which means i will update at very long intervals. hahax.

so finally, EVERYTHING is over. hahax. exams, relationship, n whole lots of things are over.

today is e last paper n last of everything, tml will be a new start in my life. n i will live happily de. hahax.

so today is econs paper. hahax. gone thru ITAB, EC, FOM, PACC, n ECONS le. hahax. erm. i didnt managed to finish pacc paper. hahax. seriously no time loh. hahax. but nvm, at least im happy tat i noe how to do most of e qns of my econs. heex. but knowing how to do and getting them right is totally diff thingy. but i hope ill get them right lah. =]

so now is holiday time. hahax. hope this holiday wont be a boring one. suddenly i feel so empty, as in, is like dunno wat to do in this holiday. so i tink just chionh work loh. working hard to stop thinking of anything. hahax.

today after exam went out wif my frens, firstly is darren then is shiya. went to vivo. hahax. bought love guru tickets but didnt watch it. waste of money. hahax. but not in any mood to watch mahx. so why force? like wat someone says, bu xi huan jiu shi bu xi huan. hahax. vivo is a place filled of memories. hahax. it started n ended there. lolz.

its wrong from e start lah. hahax. i regretted for being selfish. hahax. its a two way thingy, it wont work one way de lah. but im dumb mahx, didnt know, or instead, ignore it. so now ive learn a lesson le loh. forget about these lah. let bygones be bygones. lolz.

so i went out wif shiya, to westmall. lolz. i bought a pair of shorts le. heex. not bad bahx. i tink. gonna wear it at chalet. lolz. chit chatting wif shiya, fun fun fun. thanks shiya. =D

anw, my two little kawaii hamsters have new cage le. me n kor kor share money buy de. lolz. so today is a new start for them coz they shifted hse. lolz. hamsters, let start all over again tog.

to hamsters: dun fight le can. learn to love each other. but dun force. lolz. if not u all will get hurt de.

is like they will ever use com n read my blog. hahax.

nvm, im being bored here.

lolz.

hahax. i dunno wat else to write le. anw, tml im going out wif vonnyl, debbie, jamie, weiying n juliana. so happy. love ya all lots can. hahax. going to watch murder of inugami clan. oh no, i dun really noe how to spell. hahax.

then wed to fri will be chalet. but maybe going hm on thu night. coz have a date wif shiya on fri. lolz. anw, ah ya,u really look nice without ur braces. im falling in love wif u le. oh no. im becoming a les. but wats wrong?! hahax. anw, dun tink will be going back to sec sch. erm. coz shiya have consultation. nvm. next yr bahx. hahax.

so vonnyl,i have another reason to update my blog slowly le. lolz.

P.S: take this post as my post on friday, 080808, not sat 090808.=]

after a sleep. today its a new beginning for me. i will work hard to fulfil my promises. =]

heex. i want to erase the old me, n i will work hard de. so i shall tell myself. jia you!!! lolz.

so today. i wake up then noe wat, im sick. credit to weiying for spreading her flu virus to me. hahax. n i dun appreciate it okiez?! lolz. so now i shall hope that i will recover soon.

so i met shiya at 1200 today. lolz. ate yong tuo fu with her. then i attended my pacc lecture. lolz. but e lecture olylast for half an hr. so i went to eat sandwiches n drink milo. lolz. is like im a glutten or wat. pig i shall say. lolz. within 2hrs, i ate yong tuo fu(6 ingredients wif mee), 2 sandwiches n also one cup of milo. im damn full then. hahax. oh no, i dun wan to put on weight. sobz. but its like too late to do anything can. lolz.

so after tat as usual went for FOM tutorial. then after tat meet shiya at je mrt. n im so sad, coz my vonnyl dear de heels is badly injured i shall say. so pitiful. pray hard for her heels to recover soon. heex. vonnyl, i so good can? hahax.

then went to funan IT mall wif shiya. lolz. she bought a camera, 40D. lolz. its cool though. but ex i can say. with all e gadgets needed, it costs a total of $1835 like tat.its like so ex loh. for a student lah. hahax. if im in her course, im broke long ago. luckily e only expenses for my course is tb. lolz.

so after tat went to shop ard at marina square. its been a long time since i went shopping wif her. im so delighted. *jumping up n down* lolz. so i bought 2 tops for myself. n before i left, me n shiya are attracted to one polo tee. hahax. n i bought it for xun xun. hahax. hope he'll like it. n also hope e size is not too big bahx. lolz. i got 10% discount for e polo tee. although e difference is like a few dollars. lolz. better than nth okiez?

so after tat went back to sch to give xun xun a surprise. luckily he didnt give me any shock. lolz. but hes like dancing bahx. lolz. quite dumb actually=x. oops. erm. made me n shiya laughing there. so after tat went to somewhere near moberly to take photos. lolz. i took a lot. gonna update here when shya send me. lolz. its fun though. n tat shiya super funny. she took such a long time to set up her new cam coz she didnt even put e lens n battery for e first time then she wan activate it. is like. dumb. but somehow cute bahx. lolz. =P

so after tat went to eat at clementi. yummy. e food, nice nice. heex. then went home. home sweet home. =]

ive finally understood e meaning of happiness. hahax. im so happy to see u smile when u do e things u like, n have e freedom u wan. just then i realised tat im seriously wrong for wat i did in e past. maybe in this way, u can find e real u. hahax. if a little sacrificial can make e person u love happy, why think of whether will u be sad or not. coz isnt making e person u love smile is e best thing in life? although maybe ill not be happy but i noe i am determined to it n i will persist de. i wont think whether is it worth it or whether is it really wat i want, coz i noe tat wat i want is to be with u forever n live happily. tats wat happiness is. n thanks for my ya ya for standing by me at all times. thanks. tats wat frens are for ritez? heex. from now on, i will learn to trust. trust. n trust. heex. coz i wan a long lasting relationship. i noe wat i wan, n i will nev hesitate anymore. i will hold on to my happiness de. to myself: i noe u have made e right decision, n ill stand by u de.

hahax.
i shall sleep now.
take care.
=]

im here to blog again. vonnyl dear says i nev upload pics, so now i shall upload pics n videos. lolz.














<---- arent he cute? lolz. love him lots okiez?


for videos, press e play button on e first one. sobz. im bad at it. dunno why got 2 come out. yvonne, help!!!

this is my dear shiya introducing herself. lolz.

me.

ya ya again.

me again. hahax.

enjoy watching.

i shall upload 4 videos first. coz dunno can work ma. hahax. upload more when i feel like. lolz. just being lame here.

n now i finally realised communication is e most impt thing for a lasting relationship. so xun xun must talk to me okiez? erm. n thanks for letting me be selfish again. this time. i'll nev let go. i hope u too. heex. =]

n im happy as i finished my hw le. so i can happy use my lappy now. n tml's lecture is cancelled. so my lesson is 1300 to 1700. im not going to skates tml. coz i wan go out wif my ya ya. lolz. looking forward. =]

n i signed up for both basic photography n personal makeup lesson for self development programmes. heex. its beneficial for my zhi lian-ing. lolz.

n i shall stop here. ill update soon.

byebyex.

im having break now, n my dear yvonne is laughing like nobody's business out there. tats her lah. although she affects ppl ard her, but at least she's feeling happy. hahax. isnt tat wat e life everyone is looking for? e nobody's business n happy life. lolz. do i sound like im emo? hahax.

ppl always say that u will only realise how to cherish after u've lose it. do u really think if u get back e thing, things will still be e same? in a relationship, both parties are given a choice, no one is being forced. since u've already made ur decision why do u regret it? now, i start to believe in retributions. hahax. maybe ive hurt someone i loved before, so now, its reciprocate in my life. n now, i really have e taste of being hurt. hahax. maybe tats wat i deserve bahx.

when u have doubts in a relationship, do u think it still can last. sometimes when only one party is willing to make e change to have a lasting relationship, but e other party chose to let go, does tat help?

love is not controling n commanding. its not when u wan to break then break, when u feel tat u cant lose tat person, then u wan patch. neither of e parties is a puppet.

its true tat if u love someone, u r willing to give him e happiness he want. so when he says tat he think continuing e relationship will not make him happy, so why dun u let go?

although u noe u really love him n willing to change, but if he dun accept this change, why do u wan to be a burden in his life? when u noe ur sacrifice will make e person u love happy, wont u be contented?

ya, im contented. i really dont want n dun bear to let go, but u cant even give me e confident to cont.

thanks for everything. n thanks for letting me get e taste of being hurt.

i really hope tat we can start all over again. but is it possible?

hahax.
p.s: sorry for making this post sounds so emo?

to myself, i shall cheer up. =]